Don't Leave

In which our Lady’s Mother-in-law Flies in from “The Lower 48.”

Dear Mother-in-Law Dianne,

Please don’t ever leave me again.  I will admit that my reasons are mostly selfish.  For the last month and a half of your Christmas vacation, I have had to beg for rides from people all over this side of town.  People are willing, but I am so tired of asking.  The last few weeks, I decided to quit asking and I just stayed home all day long every day.  BOR.ING.  I am also very tired of having no relief from my child.  She’s cute, but she gets antsy when she can’t leave the house.  Oh, and have I told you yet that after you left  Eva would periodically run up to the door whenever she heard a sound outside and expectantly say “Grammy?”  Apparently, I just don’t cut it.  But for now I will push my jealousy aside and express gratitude for your willingness to do so much for my family.  Please, don’t leave for the rest of winter. I may die in your absence, if my daughter doesn’t expire first.

Beseechingly yours,

Tara

P.S. Thanks for driving me to my hair-cut appointment tomorrow morning at 11:30.  I’ll see you here at 11:20?