IN WHICH I AM TAKEN TO MAT-SU REGIONAL AND TREATED VERY KINDLY—AND FOR GOOD REASON TOO—IWOULD FIND OUT WHY LATER.
The rush of the emergency room, a swift IV, a quick X-Ray and CAT-SCAN, and then a slower MRI. And yet, the staff itself never made me feel like it was too rushed. Despite being an ER Doc, Dr. Lee was a calming man. He was very careful and slow as he came to tell me, “I’m hesitant to tell you this, but we found something in your CAT-SCAN, so we’ll need to do an MRI…”And later, with pictures included, “You have a brain tumor.” I am excellent with proportions and spatial thinking, so immediately I was calculating that it was baseball-sized—which is HUGE!!! I did not cry just then. I felt as if I was given an extra burst of calmness somehow. And so Dr. Lee continued, “Are you sure you understand?” Was he kidding? How could I possibly understand? What former experience was I to draw upon at this point in the summer of my thus-far charmed life? I know now that there is something special that happens to a person who truly cannot understand such news: her brain, whether or not tumor-ridden, just shuts down. My husband, Jon and I had no frame of reference. EVER. AT ALL. What complete bewilderment, startlement, and shock. In many ways, I feel like my brain is still stuck back at this stage.
We decided to go home that night instead of transferring immediately to Providence Hospital here in Anchorage. Before leaving, a nurse came in and handed out 3 blankets for Kirsten, Eva, and me. Its funny, because at the time I thought, “Aren’t these usually donated to people with serious problems, like cancer?” But almost in the same breath, “Well, I guess I have had an awful day…” Notice the cancer idea had not yet hit home. In fact, it would not until after the surgery. The nurse knew so much more than we did.
Showing posts with label Brain Tumor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Brain Tumor. Show all posts
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Recollections: The Beginning....
IN WHICH OUR HEROINE RECOLLECTS HER FALL, HOW SHE HIT HER HEAD, AND HAD BRAIN SURGERY.
I felt healthy that morning. The sun was shining in Hatcher's Pass. I had on hiking sandals and a baby backpack---with my child inside, yes. It was glorious. All I wanted was a few more blueberries, because the easy-to-access bushes by the side of the road were not producing. My friend Kirsten and I thought crossing a small mountain stream would be so easy. It was really only 3 or 4 feet across and there was a flat rock in the middle to step on.
One second my foot was secure, and the next it wasn't. Suddenly I slipped and that was that. I hit my forehead on said rock and apparently had a seizure. Somewhere in there I also swallowed some water. Kirsten, probably the true heroine of our little story, fished my sixteenth-month-old out of the water and the backpack and wisely saved her first. Kirsten did manage to pull my face onto the otherwise treacherous rock, so I didn’t drown and afterward pulled my whole body out. Apparently it was quite an ordeal. Kirsten is small in stature though large in all the other important ways: spirit, courage, energy, enthusiasm…etc…And yes, I do occasionally feel like worshipping she who saved my life.
After rescuing Eva, Kirsten threw her up on the bank in that baby backpack and proceeded to drag me out. I’m sorry to say that her 5 foot tall frame was no match for my less than athletic self, weighed down at this point with wet jeans and sweatshirt. I had her little finger-marks for bruises for two weeks after. Not that I’m complaining. My personal Savior then did her own form of CPR, which basically involved beating my chest really hard until water came out. The lovely blue color receded from my face, and I was alive! Naturally, I remember none of this. My brain was already done for the day.
I felt healthy that morning. The sun was shining in Hatcher's Pass. I had on hiking sandals and a baby backpack---with my child inside, yes. It was glorious. All I wanted was a few more blueberries, because the easy-to-access bushes by the side of the road were not producing. My friend Kirsten and I thought crossing a small mountain stream would be so easy. It was really only 3 or 4 feet across and there was a flat rock in the middle to step on.
One second my foot was secure, and the next it wasn't. Suddenly I slipped and that was that. I hit my forehead on said rock and apparently had a seizure. Somewhere in there I also swallowed some water. Kirsten, probably the true heroine of our little story, fished my sixteenth-month-old out of the water and the backpack and wisely saved her first. Kirsten did manage to pull my face onto the otherwise treacherous rock, so I didn’t drown and afterward pulled my whole body out. Apparently it was quite an ordeal. Kirsten is small in stature though large in all the other important ways: spirit, courage, energy, enthusiasm…etc…And yes, I do occasionally feel like worshipping she who saved my life.
After rescuing Eva, Kirsten threw her up on the bank in that baby backpack and proceeded to drag me out. I’m sorry to say that her 5 foot tall frame was no match for my less than athletic self, weighed down at this point with wet jeans and sweatshirt. I had her little finger-marks for bruises for two weeks after. Not that I’m complaining. My personal Savior then did her own form of CPR, which basically involved beating my chest really hard until water came out. The lovely blue color receded from my face, and I was alive! Naturally, I remember none of this. My brain was already done for the day.
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